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If you’re a mom of boys, you have the responsibility on your shoulders to teach them how to respect women. But what if you have girls? What do moms need to teach their daughters about respecting boys? Philippians 2:3 tells us to “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
As a boy mom and a girl mom, I wish girl moms emphasized a few more concepts with their daughters. There seem to be some holes in what our society is telling us to teach our girls. So, moms, here are five conversation starters to use with your daughters.
1. Be Kind
Boys are supposed to have a tough exterior and give the impression that words don’t bother them. But I know for a fact that unkind words hurt my little guys and my husband. They may play a tough act, but it’s just an act. No one wants to be treated unkindly. You don’t want someone being mean to your little girl. So why would it be OK for her to be mean or condescending to my little boy? It’s not. Teach your daughters that kindness always wins—always.
2. Show Respect
Explain to girls that showing respect means listening to a boy’s thoughts and ideas and valuing what he says. She may not agree with what he’s saying, but she can show him respect by taking the time to listen to him. Teach her that even when boys are very different from them, your daughter can show respect by not making fun of his differences. Friendships (and ultimately marriages) grow abundantly when both people can respect and value each other.
3. Don’t Tease
I’ve watched little girls tease my boys. My mind instantly zooms forward 10 years, and I see those same girls flirting with my boys and sending them mixed messages. Teasing may seem innocent when children are young, but teach your girls that boys can’t read minds. If your daughter doesn’t want attention from a boy, teach her that teasing gets the opposite result.
Teasing may seem innocent when children are young, but teach your girls that boys can’t read minds.
4. Respect Yourself
Boys are visually stimulated. No one can deny that. So teach your daughter about modesty. It’s possible for your daughter to dress cute and respectfully. Take time to help your daughter make appropriate wardrobe choices. If I’m teaching my boys to look at a girl’s face rather than her body, I’d appreciate it if the girl dressed as though she respected her body and wasn’t searching for stares in all the wrong places.
5. You May Have Sons Someday
My boys forever will hold a special spot in my heart. I love them with every ounce of my being, just like you love your daughter with every ounce of your being. We all hope for the very best for our kids. Remind your daughter that someday, she may be a mom to a little boy, and she won’t want to see a girl treat her son poorly. We need to teach our kids that no one is perfect and that we always should show love and respect to people different from us.
So, moms, let’s try our best to teach our kids how to respect the opposite gender and appreciate and embrace the differences between the two. And please, do your part teaching your girls to respect my boys. And I promise to teach my boys to value your girls.
Have you ever witnessed a child disrespecting your son or daughter? How did you respond?